its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
