After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
