shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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