I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
