she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
