Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
