If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
