I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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