Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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