The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Randomize
