summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
