It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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