he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize