Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
the raccoons are back...
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