Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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