goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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