she looked like the before picture.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
