Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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