She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
