i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
