So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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