how hairy? two words: wookie tits
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
