Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Randomize