So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
