I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize
