I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
