I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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