I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
