so explain again why im purple
no
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
