ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
