Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
