remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
