You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize