I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
You are a genius and a whore.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
