they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize