One girl and one boy is just not enough.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
