Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
