My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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