She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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