So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
