I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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