Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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