There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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