"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
