It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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