On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
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