I wanna passion pit in your ass
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
There r osticjed everywhere
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
