Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Sex in the backyard? Check.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
