I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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