she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Randomize
